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July 8th, 2008 - Will Porter
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Will Porter
Date: 2008-07-08 16:24
Subject: TM238. Freudian slip
Security: Public
Tags:talia, tmuse
There's this great joke about two men who're in an elevator, and it goes a little something like this:

One of them says to the other, "You ever heard of these things called Freudian slips?"

The other man says, "No, what is it?"

"Oh," says his fellow elevator passenger, "it's where you accidentally say something out loud that's an expression of your subconscious."

"Ah, gotcha, okay, I know what those are," his companion says. "So, what about them?"

"Well, the other night, my wife and I were having dinner when I made one of those Freudian slips."

"Yeah? What did you say?"

Looking a little sheepish, the man replies, "I meant to say, 'Honey, could you pass me the salt?' But instead I said, 'Bitch, you ruined my life!'"

***

I only share this badly retold joke because this topic reminds me of a dinner party Talia and I once had. She'd been running around all day trying to make sure everything was perfect for our guests. I have to admit that I wasn't being the best help because I wasn't all that excited to have her friends over. Anyway, she made this great dinner, some great hors d'oeuvres and a gorgeous dessert. Everyone ate and had a... Well, a great time. We drank lots of wine (which is probably what led to my faux pas), and eventually everyone was ready to leave. As we were saying good night to our guests, one of the husbands said to me, "Will, we'll have to do this again at our place," to which I responded, "Sure thing. Just have your wife set things up with the old bitch and chain," while nodding towards Talia.

Now, if I'd heard that coming out of someone else's mouth, I would have laughed. I clearly meant to say 'ball and chain' but I slipped up. No big deal. Her friends did not find me amusing, though. They looked like they all wanted to crawl into a hole somewhere, and I got to listen to Talia shrieking at me for the rest of the night. I swear, I didn't say it on purpose, but by the time the night was over, I was wishing I had.
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